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Have you seen Harry Butz?

I recently saw the list of the most popular names for babies born in 2016. I like to check out this list every year to see if Clint ever makes it to the Top Ten. I don’t understand why my name isn’t more common since Clint Eastwood is still very popular. Maybe next year, with numerous heart-broken Democratic women having babies, more baby boys will be named Clinton, and I will finally see my name in the Top Ten.

This past year, the top name for boys was Noah. I’m not sure why this name has become so popular. Sure, it’s a wonderful name, but how did it become such a hot name? There was that Russell Crowe movie a few years ago about Noah’s Ark, but it wasn’t seen by enough pregnant women to get Noah to the number 1 position.

There was Noah Webster a while back, but from the grammar and spelling I see in posts on Facebook, most millennials can’t spell worth a lick and apparently don’t own a Webster’s Dictionary. No sir, I don’t think 2016 babies were named after this Noah.

Coming in second place is Liam. Were the “Taken” movies really that popular to name your kid after the British actor? Again, Liam is a great name, but how did it get to number 2?

The third most common boy’s name was Mason. It’s been 30 years since Perry Mason practiced law, so I doubt he was the cause of the popularity of this name. I suspect Donald Trump was the catalyst for the mounting population of boys named Mason. You know, with all that chatter about building a brick wall and all. That’s gotta be it.

As for girls’ names, Emma, Olivia and Sophia are the top three. All are beautiful names, but I don’t know how these made the cut while Mary, Jane, and Susan dropped out of the Top 10. Nor did the names of any females in my immediate family, including Bessie make the list.

I suspect the folks who did the research and compiled this list of names were from up north. Nowhere on the list of boys’ names was Bubba Joe, Billy Bob or Hoss. And on the girls’ side, there’s not a single listing for girls with multiple names like Betty Jo, Thelma Lou or Bubba Sue. I’m with you, Donald; this thing is rigged!

Now, I understand some names may not be appropriate any longer in this era of political correctness. I don’t think Adolf will ever make the list. Neither will Idi or Attila. And there are some nice first names that shouldn’t be paired with the last name. Mr. & Mrs. Pitts shouldn’t name their baby boy Harry. Same goes for the Butz family who should also scratch Ophelia off their list of girl names.

I like the name Lancelot, but my Irish friends, the O’Boyles shouldn’t name their boy this. Great name for a dermatologist, but not a little boy. Ben is a good name and even made the top 10, but not for the Dover or Lawden families. I can’t figure out to this day why my great-grandparents of the Fly clan named my grandmother Marietta. True story.

As for 2017, I wonder if there will be a lot of girls named Hillary. Probably a lot of Michelles, too. I suspect by next March, there won’t be many boys named Donald. I bet at the end of 2017, Donald will drop down the list somewhere between Aristotle and Kanye. I do expect that here in Texas, two new names will break into the top 10: Dak and Zeke. And if the Cowboys win the Super Bowl, I bet there will be some precious little girls born in November who get christened Dakota. And maybe even Ezekial Sue.

Clint Younts just keeps hoping the name Clinton will make it into the top 10. Maybe, just maybe …


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