What kind of question is that?

Y’know, I’ve been mistaken for a lot of things. While working as a vet tech, new clients thought I was the doctor, probably due more to my age and not because I looked smart.  I’ve been told by several mature folks that I look just like Fess Parker, the guy who played Daniel Boone back in the ‘60s. One lady swore I look like actor Clint Walker, another fella who acted in numerous westerns. Depending on my attire, I may look like a cowpoke, a beach bum or a male model for hearing aids, but I doubt I’ll ever be mistaken for a geek.

I have a flip phone with no apps. I type on a computer keyboard with 1-3 fingers, depending on how bad my arthritis is at the time. I have never spoken to Alexa or Siri, but I hear they’re both rather smart gals. No sir, I’m a far piece from being mistaken for a nerd even when I wear clothes that my wife lays out for me sometimes. I will confess, though, that for the past few months, I’ve been socializing with some geeks who drink.

For y’all who don’t get out much, there’re these groups of smart young’uns who gather at trendy drinking holes and compete in trivia contests. I didn’t know about Geeks Who Drink until some of my younger kinfolk invited me and my wife to join them on trivia night at my favorite beer joint. Well, I’m pretty good at answering questions on some Jeopardy categories, and I used to win a lot at Trivial Pursuit, so I figured I’d fit right in with this group and whup their behinds in this trivia game.

As I was sitting around the table on my first venture into Geeks Who Drink, sipping a cold beer with other family members, I noticed most contestants there were younger than the boots I was wearing. Having an extra 30 years of knowledge under our belts, I figured my venerable team would win this game flat out.

Well, as soon as the first question was asked, all my teammates were wide-eyed and began looking around the table like someone had just passed gas. Who the heck is Drake, and why is everybody else whispering and writing something down? I recall some explorer named Drake but I don’t thing he had a hit song.

Okay next question, please. Huh? How would I know the capital of some African country that wasn’t even on that big globe in my World History class back in 1974? That’s not a legit trivia question. It’s a current events question. I can remember stuff from 1966 but I can’t remember what I ate for supper last night. Heck, I have a sticky note on the inside of my front door asking if I remembered to put on my pants.

Next question! Now how am I supposed to know who plays some queen on Game of Thrones? I don’t watch that show. I don’t even get HBO. That’s not fair! This game is rigged! Ask us something from our generation. How ‘bout a question about a Civil War battle or in what year was the War of 1812 fought? Now we’re cooking!

You can ask me who co-starred with Clint Eastwood in every one of his movies, and I’ll have the answer. Ask something from a ‘70s TV show or who played wide receiver for the Dallas Cowboys in 1968. Play a music clip from someone enshrined in the Grand Ole Opry and I’ll name that tune, but that crap kids are listening to now sounds like somebody’s castrating pigs to me.

If you’re wondering why I keep going to Geeks Who Drink and losing badly to those smart kids, I enjoy seeing my dear kinfolk and chatting about old times during the breaks in the game. And did I mention the cold beer? Plus, who knows, maybe one night, when the planets are aligned, the quizmaster will ask a question about John Wayne and I’ll impress the heck out of all those young whippersnappers.

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