Like many Americans allergic to adulting, I often zone out on Facebook when I should be doing something more useful – like scooping the litter box or lecturing my children about the dangers of social media. Inevitably, I come across one of those surveys posted by Facebook users who are probably planning to hack into my account and steal my pet selfies.

I recently saw a survey that asks you to identify various rock concerts you’ve attended, and since my teen years were in the 1980s, at...