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Answer this for me …

By Clint Younts

If y’all are like me, we have a go-to guy (or gal) for advice on solving some problem. Like when you have a computer issue or your car is making a funny noise. Some folks might have someone on speed dial whom they’ll call to get help with a crossword puzzle. I suspect some of y’all know at least one person whom you believe have all the answers. 

Due to my medical training and decades of doctoring 4-legged critters, I often get calls about friends’ pets. And due to my lengthy personal medical history, I also get asked how to treat certain physiological maladies. Occasionally I get questions about wildlife and how to “relocate” them from manicured lawns, but I’ll be the first to say that I don’t have all the answers. There are some things I just don’t know, like…

How does everyone I know own a car with its warranty about to expire? My truck is 16 years old and I had no idea it still has a warranty.

Why do some folks refuse to accept the concept of climate change even as they watch their house float down Main Street?

Why can Matthew McConaughey not use any deodorant and smell great while most men’s body odor would resemble that of a dead skunk plucked out of a porta-potty?

Why does road construction in front of public schools begin the week before school starts instead of early June?

Why are so many Americans more concerned over Afghan citizens than our children in neighborhood schools?

Why can I eat jalapeno peppers without getting heartburn but one bite of a kosher dill pickle will light up my esophagus like Mount Vesuvius?

Why do so many people refuse to get an FDA-approved vaccine but have no problem ingesting a livestock dewormer? I might’ve found the answer to this question. After closely reading the label on a bottle of ivermectin, it is approved for treating internal parasites in jackasses.

What happened to our educational system that has turned out so many idiots who will believe everything they read in social media?

Why do bicyclists believe they don’t have to stop at red lights or obey other traffic laws?

Speaking of traffic, why do 3 out of 4 motorists have no idea how to use their turn indicators, something installed in cars since 1939? Young drivers must believe this stick is for hanging their masks on to air out.

How can some imported residents constantly complain about the summer weather in Texas and not pack up and return to their home state where an 87-degree day is considered “dangerously hot”?

Why do some people say, “She’s beautiful inside and out”. Do they have X-ray vision?

Why do folks move into huge subdivisions alongside a two-lane country road and then complain about the traffic?

How does a feral hog know it’s safe to root up my yard on the night I’m passed out in my recliner?

What has caused such division in our country? After we were attacked by foreign enemies on December 7, 1941 and again on September 11, 2001, American stood united. But now, as our nation is currently under attack by a foreign entity, only half of us are fighting for our country. United we stand, divided we fall. Please get vaccinated.

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