by Rich Manieri
I never had the Easter Bunny pegged for a PR flack, but he can now add it to his CV.
Shortly after the White House Easter Egg Roll, the basket-toting Easter Bunny intervened and led President Biden away from a reporter who asked the president about Afghanistan. The funny thing was Biden actually followed the Easter Bunny’s instructions as if it were all perfectly normal. Additional questions on international affairs were referred to the Tooth Fairy.
Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-Minn) fired off an Easter tweet taking issue with a viral video that showed a Christian worship leader playing his guitar and singing with several other passengers on a commercial flight. It was, after all, Easter Sunday.
“I think my family and I should have a prayer session next time I am on a plane. How do you think it will end?” Omar tweeted.
To answer her question, I predict it would end uneventfully. Omar wasn’t on the flight so I’m not sure why she cares, unless she just objects to anyone publicly celebrating a faith that isn’t hers.
CNN spent $300 million to launch it’s new CNN+ platform which proved to be about as popular as John Wilkes Booth. The network had hoped to attract about 2 million subscribers the first year but signed up a paltry 150,000 before announcing it was pulling the plug. I have an idea for CNN that could solve all of its problems – how about just covering the news?
If you’re going to transport illegal drugs, you need to pay attention to the details, such as making sure you have fuel in your vehicle. A Tennessee woman, who was hauling about 230 pounds of marijuana, ran out of gas on a bridge, which tends to attract the attention of police. When the cops showed up, she advised them not to go inside the vehicle, which also tends to attract the attention of the police. Police did search the vehicle and found enough cannabis to get half of Memphis stoned silly. The woman was promptly arrested.
Actor Johnny Depp is involved in a very public defamation suit against his ex-wife. It’s all very sordid and sad but I don’t care either.
It was inevitable but Major League Baseball players will soon serve as walking billboards. The San Diego Padres are the first team to strike a deal with an advertiser. Motorola will be buying space on uniform sleeves and helmets to advertise its line of cell phones. The bigger story is that Motorola still makes phones.
If you own stock in Netflix, I hope you sold most of it. If you don’t, now might be a good time to buy. Shares are down 25% and the streaming giant is hemorrhaging subscribers – 200,000 last quarter. What happened? For starters, consumers are no longer housebound and other streaming services are gaining traction. Tesla and SpaceX CEO Elon Musk believes he knows what’s going on. “The woke mind virus is making Netflix unwatchable,” Musk tweeted. Instead of listening to Musk, Netflix announced it was going to crackdown on password sharing, further endearing itself to already-disgruntled subscribers.
A California woman flipped out on flight attendants, opened the plane’s emergency exit door and slid down the inflatable slide moments before takeoff from Buffalo. She then ran around the tarmac for a bit until police caught her. There’s something about air travel that turns otherwise reasonable people into raving maniacs. It has to be more than surly flight attendants and delays. Maybe travelers will be less grumpy now that a federal judge has struck down the Biden administration’s mask mandate. Maybe not, which dovetails nicely with our final item.
If you were going to become rude and unruly on a commercial airplane, who is the last person on earth you would want to antagonize? Go ahead. I’ll give you a minute. How about Mike Tyson?
Indeed, on a recent JetBlue flight, a passenger sitting behind Tyson made the ill-advised decision to talk trash to the former heavyweight champ. Published reports indicate that, initially, Tyson repeatedly and politely asked the man to stop. He didn’t. What happened next? Take another minute. Yes, Tyson, having had enough, unleashed a restrained combination to this Bozo’s skull. I say restrained because if Tyson really wanted to hurt the guy, he would have disembarked toes up. As it was, he had a few cuts and bruises.
I would like to propose the launching of a new airline specifically for passengers who can’t behave themselves, like the guy behind Tyson and the woman in Buffalo. We can call it “Unruly Air” or something like that. I’m not married to it. But we need capital and leadership. Mr. Musk, are you listening?
Rich Manieri is a Philadelphia-born journalist and author. He is currently a professor of journalism at Asbury University in Kentucky. You can reach him at email@example.com.