By Brittany Kelley BUDA — Buda residents Garrett 17, and Ava, 16, Gray suffered tragedy at a young age when their father, Maj. W. David Gray, who served in the Air Force, was killed in August 2012. Although their loss affects them greatly, through the assistance of Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS), the pair is learning to grapple with their grief, while creating fond memories.
TAPS began in 1994 by founder and president Bonnie Carroll, who lost her husband in 1992, explained Ava. According to its website, the nonprofit aims to provide care and resources for those grieving a death in the military or veteran community.
“My father was killed in action in Afghanistan when I was only 4 years old. Being so young at the time, I, not only was confused by the situation and the fact that my father was no longer present, but I had no idea what it even meant to grieve,” Ava revealed. “It wasn’t until years later did I start to begin to comprehend what grief was and I realized I [have] delayed grief.”
After expressing these feelings to her mother, who suggested she get involved in TAPS, Ava attended her first event in September 2023.
It was at this event that Ava found more than she could have ever bargained for: safety and understanding.
“I found I was not alone. There were people from all places, of all ages and all different stories, yet we all shared a common loss — someone we loved.”
TAPS has several resources and programs in place for those grieving, including, but not limited to:
• Seminars: discussion-based events with workshops on grief and smallgroup sharing sessions
• Peer mentors: survivors 18 months past their loss who aid fellow survivors that experienced a similar loss
• Suicide loss support
• Women’s empowerment
• Men’s program
• Young adult: for 18-30-year-olds and focuses on the 5 Pillars of Growth
• Grief counseling
• Casework: help resolving issues on burial, managing benefits, records, etc.
In May of this year, Ava attended the National Military Survivor Seminar and Good Grief Camp, which is annually held over Memorial Day weekend in Washington, D.C.
Later, marking her one-year anniversary with the program, Ava learned of the Heroes Family Global Exchange Camp, a collaboration between the Republic of Korea’s Ministry of Patriots and Veterans Affairs and TAPS. TAPS reached out and invited children with ties to Korea or the Korean War, said Ava.
“I was so excited to be a part of this opportunity and, this time after sharing my experience with TAPS, my brother decided to join. Both of us felt a strong connection to Korea, [with] our grandmother being from Busan, Korea,” Ava said. “My brother and I have been
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